my son wants to be a girl

This is a very long article  with lots of food for thought. I'm only commenting on one, relatively minor piece of it:  " Separation from the mother is an important part of the infant’s psychological development. However, the psychological and physical separation can be experienced as trauma. This in turn can lead to either a wish to possess the mother in some way, or a grievance toward the mother, as the infant finds it hard to give up the ideal relationship represented by the primary maternal preoccupation. In a recent paper entitled   Time and the Garden of Eden Illusion , psychoanalyst John Steiner describes the common fantasy of returning to an imaginary, idealized relationship with one’s mother.....   American-Canadian sexologist Ray Blanchard coined the term autogynephilia to describe a male’s propensity to be sexually aroused by the thought of himself as a female. But even in cases where such sexualized impulses are absent, a trans woman may be impelled by a desire t

So now that my son wears typical boys clothes most of the time, why am I still occupying myself with this topic? Because I have a feeling that he is cutting off a part of himself. I've offered to buy him pink stuff, but he insists thats for boys. Last year for Purim (a bit like Jewish Halloween) I offered him a tutu skirt, although his dad was not in favor. He declined, and chose red lady bug wings instead, which i found a creative compromise on his part. But this year, he's asked to be Spiderman. (like at least 5 other boys in his class). So whats bothering me? I see that hes expressing his interest in girl fashion vicariously. As most immediately available female, he tries with me. I'm a jeans and ponytail kind of gal, but he often asks me to put on make up, he wants to style my hair, or tries to convince me to wear some of my formal occasion wear stuffed in the back of  my closet. His still plays princess at home with makeshift old clothing and headgear, althou